Can you call something that if it happened just last week? Ha...I'm kidding. Well, kind of.
my beautiful mom! and cute dad of course.
So I call pretty much everyone I know to kill time on my commute to Provo. 99% of the time the only one with the time (a.k.a. patience) to listen to me is my mom...she's the best! If you know her you know why...true? Yes.
The other people I call feel used & abused by the classic Chelsey commute call (a myth which I would like to put to rest right now...I call because I love you, not because there's nothing better to do...most of the time. That goes for you too Parker...J).
So yes, I really enjoy these chats with my mom. I learn so many fun things [today she primed a little pep talk with a story about how she discovered I was smart when I memorized my first primary talk as a Sunbeam...apparently I straight-armed her when she tried to whisper the prompts in my ear and then glared at the Bishop when he told me what a great job I did because I resented the way he acted like it was hard (this is all at age 3 mind you). it sounded more to me like this was a greater testament to my being a snob than an indication of any super-genius, but parents have a way of making everything sound good. so love them!] and I feel like the more we talk, the more I realize what a truly amazing individual my mom is. I knew it before, I just appreciate it more now. I think it's sad it takes kids so long to realize how wonderful their parents really are (note to 15-almost-16-year-old sister: when you're the only kid at home, a little kindness goes a long way...you're coming up on car season haley bailey! be smart J). I could go off on a whole post with this topic, so before I do, I'll just lay it out. I love my Mom. I owe her my life (and my sanity most days). And she's the best example to me of what a woman, leader, wife, mother, and friend should be. The end.
My point in referencing these chats is that this week, during one of these conversations, my Mom mentioned something that caught my attention. I'd called to ask a quick recipe tip and ended up chattering on and on and on about how much fun I'd had over the weekend with friends.
Last Friday we had a chance to visit two entirely different worlds. First stop for the night...my BYU Freshman Ward reunion. I had mixed feelings going into it. There are so many people from that time in my life that I just love. We made a million memories that year and never stopped having fun.
From Vegas vacations...
to Reno road trips...
to BIG asking...
to BIG dances...
to BIG birthdays...hooray 18!!!
to bonfires & camping...
to crazy girls' trips...
to Marriott Center movie nights...
to RB twilight cleaning crews...
to illegal ski jumps off the stairs...
to our 007 skills for sneaking between dorms...
we had a BLAST!
In addition to giving me some of my best and brightest memories of BYU, my Freshman friends gave me an entirely new perspective on friendship. Quantity doesn't always mean quality (unoriginal, I know, but important still). It doesn't take a million years of knowing someone to develop the kind of friendship that will last a lifetime. And we're proof. I will love these friends my whole life long. Even when things change...
And that's when it hit me. Life has changed. I've changed. And no matter how excited I was to see my best boy buddies fresh off their missions or my adorable fun-loving floormates, I couldn't help but feel a little sad that it could never be the same for us. They're all still single...all still living the Provo life...all in a place where I can't, won't, and don't want to go back to. And the girl they all came to see—even though the best parts of her are still here—she's not the person they left. She grew up. She changed. And they did too. Just in different ways.
Don't get me wrong, the reunion was a HIT! We laughed and smiled and chatted and reminisced for hours. And we will stay the best of friends, I promise you that. We just won't be spending every Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday night together like we used to (we were inseparable...if you couldn't tell).
So yes...it was hard to leave the reunion an watch all my old pals trot off to In-N-Out to pick up where we all left off without me...until I looked at Parker and remembered why I am so incredibly happy to be exactly where I am now.
BUT, just in case that wasn't enough, Heavenly Father blessed me with a very firm reminder that marriage did not kill the socialite in me. segway to..MARRIED FRIENDS!!!
They arrived right on cue. As soon as we left the reception Natalie & Bennett called us to connect and we in turn called Michael & Kayla. And before we knew it we had this entirely new friend dynamic! We bowled—talked about married life—checked out the Bennetts' new apartment—revisited our registry shopping spree stories—played games—mused about our futures—ate pie—teased our sweet little spouses about awkward first kisses.
Imagine that...having discussions about married life that go beyond, "-So how's married life? -It's great! -Oh I bet...(picture thought bubble) this is awkward. I'm going to keep quiet until you decide to ask me about my life or I walk away."
It made my heart so happy! The girls and I chatted in the kitchen for over an hour about everything (no surprise there), and the boys sitting in the living room...they did exactly the same!!! I couldn't believe it! No awkward silence. No wandering into the kitchen to give the wife the exit cue. No anxious looks over in our direction begging for us to come save the conversation. No. They chattered away just as long as we did and loved every minute. Blew me away!
I haven't come away from a night on the town that happy in quite awhile. Parker agreed. We'd forgotten what it meant to have friends! Of course our family are our friends (and amazing ones at that), but we'd missed out on this peer group atmosphere for the entirety of our first four months together...and I can't tell you how eager I am to get back there again. In fact, we're going back tomorrow!!!
My best friend Nicole is dating a cute boy these days and let me sweet talk (a.k.a. bully) her into joining the married clan for a night so I can finally meet him! I've planned for another game night...couple's Olympics. The couple with the highest points (between rounds of Wacky 6, Taboo, Pictionary, and Sequence) will be declared the winners. And then we will all add to our love-chubb with pazookis while we enjoy a midnight movie (a.k.a. redbox...we're poor. none of us do theaters anymore).
The way this all ties back to my convo with my mom—as I chattered on about the fun I'd had with our best little married friends and all my angst at my reunion, she reminded me how everything in life has its season. It's so simple, I know, which is why I couldn't believe I'd missed it!
My freshman friends were there when I'd needed them to be silly and sassy and spontaneous. They made my first year at BYU unforgettable and will continue to be my BFF's I know...just not in the same way.
Because now that life's changed, and I've changed with it, I'm ready to say hello to this new chapter in life AND the friends that come with it. They are feisty and fun and ready to take on the world...just like I am. It is fabulous.
I am SO happy to be where I am today! Married life is the best...and married friends make it that much better. Happy day...
Hey you! Sweet blog...who are these "super-star" amazing parent? I'd love to meet them!!! I'm afraid we're way overrated, BUT, so appreciate the kudos. I love that you are so very bias in our favor!
ReplyDeleteLove you...good luck tomorrow. Thanks so much for your kind words.
married life is VERY different from single life, and it is weird/entertaining to be around single people because you are just past that stage in life. amen to everything you said sista friend.
ReplyDeleteChels, I can't relate to the whole being married part, but I feel the same way about everything that you said about growing up and moving on...took the words right out of my mouth, girl! Life is crazy how fast it changes, but it's great. Thanks for being my friend over the years. The mems we have are great!
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