Thursday, November 10, 2011

good news minute [sealed with a Kip]

remember these two little lovebirds?
I don't.
Just kidding!!!
I totally do.
It is just amazing to me how busy our lives seem to be these days.
All of us.
{i tend to jump from A to C to D. 
[parker says it's only C because stress makes me "mean-sassy" instead of "hot-sassy"...
whatever that means]
but B is typically a constant in the equation regardless of the stress-level.
I could be lazing away in a Swedish spa for a year-long retreat and still be craving bapples.
it's the hippo in me...}
I wonder sometimes if we'd even be able to out-swim the tides of life that so frequently test the bonds of our friendships by sweeping one couple or another off the social beach and out to sea if we were neighbors.
As much as my perpetually optimistic [and oftentimes unrealistic] alter-ego attempts to answer that with a yes, the more rational part of my brain takes over and offers up a resounding "no."  
{considering our track record with the friendlings that live a whole half-mile away is about as great as the Sparks girls' driving records 
ahem  nicole, jillian, tiffany, danielle, kayla 
[who is simply guilty by association — I believe I was en route to a certain Abacus Court the day of the infamous bus run-in...]
and maybe me too.
anyway, this busyness of life has a way of sending me through a spiral of emotions.
poor parker...
It begins with well-intentioned denial.
"We just saw so-and-so in October right baby? October may feel far away but it really isn't. I mean, with how fast these years go, it'll be here again before we know it!"
"Plus, we've been friends forever."
{Parker: "sometimes even forever friends grow apart Chels..."}
"not us. 
Our friendships will transcend time and space and everything in between.
We're not the friends that have to chat every single day to keep the maintain the b, the f, or the other f in BFFWe have a kind of F-ESP {friend-ESP}
We know we love each other."
Which segues to skepticism and a slew of irrational assumptions & insecurities.
"Oh man Park — I don't know. What if they've just been waiting for us to call and are now convinced I am the most terribly self-absorbed, unpredictably flaky, incredibly apathetic friend in the world?
Oh I bet they just hate me!!!
wait a minute..."

"Friendship is a two-way street right?
In which case, why haven't heard from anybody?
not like we had any time for that nonsense anyway.
"Oh my goodness!
We've been replaced.
Park — my besties totally have new besties!!!
How did I let it come to this?"
And finally concludes with Parker's attempts to comfort this heartbroken, dejected,inconsolable little bucket of despair.
"I deserve a straight-up F in BFF 101."
"How could I be so foolish to think our friendships could self-sustain through such inattentiveness and neglect?
could've-should've-would've done x, y & z approximately 15 - 50 times more each week.
I just  I just never thought we'd grow apart like this you know?"

Whatever happened to best friends forever?
{a trembling finger points to an old picture}
I don't even know who these people are anymore.
I mean, they could like Crocs for all I know now.
or even...
 {cue 5-minute freak out over BFF's falling in love with cankle boots.}
and now we can't ever be friends again...
{cue hysteria}
[the end]
{i hope you appreciated the melodramatic recounting of these episodes.
it may or may not be a fully accurate account...}
Needless to say, my teeny tiny little brain seems to have a knack for sparking ideas that force me to overcome my fears about the status of those friendships that seem to have fallen in the black abyss of life's busyness and make a call.
These calls typically follow a fairly standard format.
take my call with Nicole today:
"hey you! it's been forever!"
"i know, right?
what've you two been up to?"
"nothing really — just finals craziness. i'm so over school. how's life for you & parker?"
"busy — as always. i think i need to kind of come to terms with that fact. it's seeming to be the adjective i default to whenever anyone asks how we are."
"i know what you mean. i feel like we kind of do the same thing every day."
"so no life-altering events?"
"nope. you?"
"none that i can think of."
"haha — we sound so sad..."
"i could be worse though. i could be a hobo living under a bridge by the next time we chat."
"i could see that..."
aside to parker: "hey bebe! we're still friends!"

{and then the eye roll}
whatever Parker.
this is real happiness.
{as is this...}
Long story short, it's okay to be busy
because there really is such a thing as BFF's.
And this girl,
I'll have you know,
is exactly that.
Which is what brings us here today.

On December 1, 2011,
Nicole Faye celebrated a very special anniversary. 
Just five months ago,
on a sunny July morning,
Nicole was sealed with a Kip
{and a kiss}
for time and all eternity
in the Salt Lake Temple.

And has spent every blissfully happy day since beaming at the thought that they are,
and forever will be, 
Mr. & Mrs. Kip Andrew Stromberg.
In celebration of this proverbial milestone
{and by this I mean marriage.
sorry kiddos...kudos on the 5-month mark, but let's be honest — 
you still have a ways to go until you secure veteran status.
I mean, I would know...}
I decided to take a brief glimpse into the lives of these two newlyweds.

But before I let Kip & Nicole take it away,
let me just say,
I have never seen Nicole look more beautiful than she did on her wedding day.

And I don't think it had a thing to do with the uncharacteristic volume in her hair, the perfectly flushed cheeks or the subtle shimmer and sparkle surrounding her vibrant green eyes, or even the cascades of white chiffon that mirrored her every step.
no  I think every ounce of her beauty that day stemmed from a feature that isn't quite as easily achieved.
{a facet of beauty no hairspray, bronzer or glamorous gown could recreate}

I know what it looks like now.
And I'm convinced it is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen.
"There is no cosmetic for beauty like happiness."
Lady Marguerite Blessington
{too true!
This beauty tip will transcend time ladies.
my advice
Learn it. Live it. Love it.}

Kip & Nicole Stromberg!!!
I'd wish you two all the happiness in the world,
but I think it's safe to say you've found it.
{and thanks again for the exclusive.}
What's been the hardest thing about these first five months of marriage?

"I don't know if this is a lame answer—but just kind of taking on the "wife" role. Like being the one who makes the house a home or the little housewife who's on top of all the domestic duties. Ever since we got married I've felt like I needed to be the one doing all those things. I felt this pressure to cook dinner every night and clean the house every week and make everything look perfect—but then I wouldn't and would feel like this horrible person and wonder why I couldn't do everything. And then, of course, I start to be more realistic and start being likewait...we're in exactly the same position—we both work, we both go to school. Why should I be the one who has to do everything? I mean, Kip never expected that at all. I'd just brought it upon myself because of societal expectations surrounding marriage and whatnot. 
{Why is this so often the case?
That new wives [and veterans too] develop an unreasonably guilty conscience for not taking on 120% of the work 100% of the time?
It always seems so self-imposed too.
Whoever said we had to be the ones to carry the weight of the world?
It puzzles me...}
Anyway, so I guess that's been the hardest thing—just figuring out my role."
"Having to get up at six each morning when Nicole gets to sleep in all the time."
Nicole in the background: "hey!!!"
Kip: "well you do..."
Nicole: "you would too if you could."
Kip: "of course I would!"
Nicole: "it just makes me sound so lazy..."
Kip: "well..."
Nicole: "hey!!!"
{fade to laughter}
What was the most surprising thing about marriage?
"Most surprising? I think the most the surprising thing was like, how easy it was to transition. I guess I always thought of it as being really hard. I like had this idea that I was going to discover all these things that were tough to deal with or hard to adjust to.
actually...that wasn't the most surprising.
The most surprising thing was discovering this whole new side to Kip I hadn't seen before. We spent a lot of time together before so I knew him, but spending every second with him and living together and making decisions together let me see a completely different side to him that I never saw when we were dating."
{Can you give us an example?}
"What's an example...oh! Just that he is the snuggliest person ever!!! He was like that when we were dating—like he liked to cuddle and stuff—but now he'll come home from school and cuddle up by me on the couch where I'm doing homework and be like, "Let's just snuggle — like just for a little minute." 
And I'm like, "I'm busy!" 
And he's like, "No, we need to snuggle. Just for a minute—that's all."
He's like an extreme cuddler now. 
It's pretty cute." 
{I have to agree.
Between nicole's kip and my parker, I'm beginning to see a trend.
any other closet cuddlers out there?
do tell...}
"Everything people say about marriage — that's kind of how it is. Which means there really haven't been too many surprises."
{What most surprised you about Nicole then?}
"I didn't know this 'til we were married — but Nicole is definitely not a morning person. If it's before 9 o'clock and there's no alarm set, don't wake her up." 
{why's that?}
"She will be very angry with you."
Nicole: "hey!!!"
Chelsey: "no moderating Cole."
Nicole: "boo..."
{not to worry  I git chu girl.
Parker would say the same thing about me.
I think husbands think that liking sleep like every other human being on this planet and/or not popping up out of bed each morning like a little spring chicken is the equivalent of "not being a morning person."
But just because they say it doesn't mean it's true...
in this case I kind of think it is though.
What would you say is the the funniest thing about marriage?

"I think the funniest thing about marriage is that everything they say is true! 
You do stay in on Friday nights because you're too tired and too apathetic to make plans. 
You do become each other's best friends. 
And you do forget what life was like before all this.
Realizing that those things are true and that there are legitimate reasons for all those stereotypes made me laugh. It's like, "oh...that's why." I guess I think it's funny just because I get it now."
"Well, you definitely see a different side of each other. You know, the walls come down and you don't care as much about censoring yourself or putting a face on like you do when you're dating. I mean, Cole's definitely done a lot more dumb things since we've been married than she did while we were dating. Like the other day when she tried to call me a rough snuggler but accidentally called me a "rugly snuffer" instead."
{I'm guessing you couldn't really take her seriously after she said that.}
"Not really. That's probably why I kept rugly snuffing her."
 {Let's save the elaboration on that one for later.
next question...}
What is the dumbest thing you two fight about?

{speaking of anyone else in love with Tiff's face in this photo sequence?}

{oh how I miss this girl!}

"Taylor Swift vs. Carried Underwood"
{That is so dumb.} 
"I know it's dumb — but we fight about it all the time."
{Would you care to share your position?}
"I like Taylor Swift more than Carrie Underwood. And if you're talking in terms of who is the better all-around musician, it's totally Taylor. 
She writes her own songs. 
She's super popular. 
Everyone loves her. 
He thinks Carrie's better because he's only basing it on voice."
"Let's just say that as a musician, I know every song of Taylor Swift's only consists of about three chords."
{Do you think you'll ever resolve the fight?}
"We already have — well kind of. We agreed to disagree and just don't talk about it anymore. Tell me this though, who would you pick?"
{I'm going to leave this one open to all of you.
I made my decision, but only after changing the question to,
"If you could only have one artist on your iPod, who would be on it?"
I was a total fence-sitter 'til I broke it down like that.
I could see how it could escalate...}
Which marriage stereotype have you found to be absolutely true?

"Probably the antisocial thing. I mean, we do stuff — we just don't do it with other people as much anymore. Once you're married, you definitely don't have the social life that you did as a single person. That's why thinking people think married people are so boring. 
except we're not. 
We just trade doing things in big groups or parties for things we can do together. Besides, who better to spend the weekend with than your best friend?"
{Do you watch lots of movies?}
"Oh yes — we love movies!"
"Probably that you really have no life — and by that I mean no social life. You don't have any friends. I mean you do. But you find yourself being lazy on the weekends quite a bit more. I think for guys, once you're married, you start to think, "I've got a girl. I don't have to work for it anymore." It's like the social network's a tool."
 {so you're saying we're no longer of use to you?
huh Kip?
Is that what you're saying?!
i's keeding.
jus' keeding.}
What is the best thing about marriage?

"I think it's just always having somebody there to support you. They're always there. They're always home. They're always around to make you feel better if you're having a stupid day. I don't know...they're just always there. And you never have to worry because you know they are and always will be."
"Just always being able to see her. When I have a hard day, she's the one I get to come home to — and just the thought of that make it that much easier."
How do you split the housework? Do you have exclusive ownership over any of the chores?

"It's pretty even actually. He does do the trash though — I hate the trash. He has to kill the spiders too. I don't do spiders. But ya...I think all the other one's are pretty even. We do the dishes the same; we cook the same. Oh but I do dust. Kip never dusts."
"Well, the garbage is mine. If there's ever a spider to kill, that's mine. That's about it though. We kind of just take turns with all the other stuff."
Would you say you love each other more now than when you first got married? 
And because I already have a good idea of how you'll answer, could you please tell us why that's the case?
"Yes! I love him so much more. I think it's because I've seen all these new sides to him and learned so much more about him. Plus it's all good things too. I just love him so much more for it you know?"
"I'd definitely say yes. And I think it's probably because I know her so much better now than I did before. When we were dating, we didn't really know each other. We did, but we didn't. We didn't really have any fights. But now that we've had those, we've grown together, and grown closer because of it. It's cool to find out all those things about her too that validate how good we are for each other. That's really cool actually."
How do most of your fights end? How do you resolve the problem?

{Kip & Nicole}
"Most of the time we just agree to disagree and then move on. Our arguments are usually over little things that can be overlooked, so that's what we do. We drop it."
 {so what about when it's something big?
like, you have to make a compromise or concession.
Like what if your future little boy wanted more than ANYTHING to be a dancer and Nicole was like, "We need to support him honey!"
Nicole: "Really? A dancer?"
This is my hypothetical. Quiet now.
But you're like, "No. If we sign him up for Little League and Junior Jazz he'll forget all about it."
But she's adamant that you should just go along with jazz class {not Junior Jazz practice} and support him.
What do you do then?
Kip: "When that time comes— I can't imagine it will, but who knows  we'll work together to find a good solution. We'll be good."
{so much for my attempt at stirring the pot.
this picture-perfect pair is kind of too perfect...
I should've focused my attention on T-Swift & Carrie...}
Do you have any traditions? Any cute little quirks or routines that are unique to just the two of you?

"We do always take a nap on Sunday. Other than that I don't think we really have any...oh! We have the kissing one! If one of us puckers our lips, we have a rule that the other one has to kiss them. Even if they're mad at them. Kip coined the term, "Cole kisses" for the little abrupt ones I give him when I'm mad. He says Cole kisses are the lame kisses haha."
Kip from the kitchen: "because they are..."
{can you tell us how the pucker rule came about?}
"Oh I don't know. I think it was just that Cole wouldn't kiss me so I had to find a way that she would. It started way back when we were dating."
What would you say was your favorite thing about your wedding day?

"I'd have to say sitting together in the temple just before we were sealed just because — I don't know  I was just so nervous and so scared getting ready that morning and I hadn't slept well the night before. But as soon as I was there — as soon as we were together and I could just see him and talk to him and be with him — it all went away. It was the craziest thing and is definitely one of my favorite memories of that day."
"Honestly, everything was great. I think the best part was being around family though. That was awesome. Just because Cole has a super solid family and I love my family. Having all of them there and just being able to be around them all at the same time was great. Oh — and the night of, of course."
Nicole: "Kip you can't say that!"
Kip: "but I did..."
Nicole: "oh my gosh. it's on the record."
Kip: "and cole in her hot lingerie..."
Nicole: "Kip!"
Chelsey: "bahaha  that's on the record too!"
Nicole: "do not write that."
{not to worry my dear friend,
nobody reads this far into these posts anyway.
I'll honestly be shocked if you even get this far...}
What is the cutest thing about Kip?

"Just that he's always doing sweet little things for me. He'll buy me my favorite candy bar or make me breakfast — just little random things like that. 
Wait — I changed my mind. 
The cutest thing about Kip is how he always gets my car door and won't let me walk on the road side of the sidewalk. His chivalry I guess. It's nice to know it wasn't just a show while we were dating. He still does it and it's still every bit as sweet."
What is the cutest thing about Nicole?
"That's a hard question because I just feel like everything she does is cute. That's what I would say — just everything."
What do you admire most about one another?
"I admire his optimism. Nothing really gets him down and he's always very positive and just happy all the time. You don't see that that often in people."
"Probably just that she makes me want to be better. I always want to be better for her and work harder for her. She gives me a reason to want to do it because she is the reason I want to do it — if that makes any sense."
Is there anything you'd like to add?
"Kip is my favorite and I love him!"
Kip: "That's a lie."
Nicole: "hey!!!"
"Marriage is the best! It's sweet! 
And — I don't know. 
There's not much else to say..."
No need Kip — I think you summed it up right there.
Congratulations again you two!!!
Thank you for giving us all a reason to celebrate each July 1st
{according to my Canadian marketing buddy, that's Canada too.
but I figured that doesn't really count}
and thank you for letting us be a part of such a perfect start to your forever!
loved seeing you so happy then 
and just love that you're so happy still.
Oh and Kip — thanks for being such a good BFF to my bestie.
I hope you know I'm only okay with it because
a. I think you're cool and
b. I know I'm still technically number one.
{if you're judging by seniority;
which i am...}

My dearest Colie,
here's to being
best. friends. forever.
and forever after that.
love always,
your best-est BFF
{seniority Kip — seniority}

coming up...
good news minute [Tiff international]