Sunday, November 21, 2010

parenting

is exhausting.
but oh so much fun.
This weekend Parker and I played house with the Langston boys.
We'd looked forward to Friday all week!
We couldn't wait to be kids again,
leave all our worries at the door,
and just PLAY.

And that's exactly what we did.
And probably why we were so zonked come Saturday.

Between Dice-capades, murderer, Mega-Megamind (in Tyler's words), around-the-clock ESPN coverage, and countless hours spent watching the mini-Miners 2010 season highlights
the boys were in heaven.
all the boys.
Parker's motive for trying to sell me on being a "boy-mom" is now so clear.

Parker and I crashed on the couch around 11.
We'd been a bit soft on bedtime.
But a 10:30 tuck-in must make for a few extra hours of sleep, right?
wrong.
All four boys were up-and-running and ready for breakfast by 7:30.
And the twins made good on their promise of a 6 o'clock wake-up call.
I couldn't believe it.

We lucked out having Dave, Jake, Ethan, and Tyler for our first parenting practice run.
They're definitely boys...
high-energy, rough-and-tumble, competitive little cubs
...but they're little angels too.

They have their get-ready-for-bed regime down to a tee.
"Pleases" and "thank yous" come right on time, every time.
And when you ask them to do something, they do it!
No arguments. No complaints. No need to ask them three, or four, or five times.
Just one request, maybe a quick reminder, and they're on it.
every time.
without fail.
it's amazing.
Lara & Kirk deserve gold stars for parenting.
seriously..I'm so impressed.

BUT,
even with the most well-behaved little boys,
we came home and fell straight into a coma.
Not a nap.
A coma.

Granted, this parenting night came on the heels of a very long week.
But I'm 99.9% sure parents have longs weeks too.
And yet they still do it.

My question is how?
How do you parents do it?!
Parenting's rewarding.
There's no question about that.

I loved seeing those boys soak up new information like sponges.
Loved hearing them rave about Megamind like regular movie critics.
Loved listening to the twins spout off NFL and mini-Miner stats like professional sportscasters.
Loved watching Ethan proudly tell the story of each piece in his trophy collection.
Loved the way little Tyler'd cuddle up to me "just because."
And just loved having all these little people competing for my attention.

It was priceless.
And precious.
And so incredibly cute.

So I get that.
I get that it's rewarding.
And that's great.

But, if you're the super-parent you should be,
by the end of the day you are spent.
And, long before you're ready for it, that end of the day is the start of a new one.
And you get to do it all over again.
I'm not sure I could do that.
Not well at least.
Not yet.
Because I definitely saw a difference in my Day 1 & 2.

Day 1 I played the game.
Day 2 I supervised.

Day 1 I tried to make meaningful conversation.
Day 2 I just listened.

Day 1 I worked to make the most of every minute.
Day 2 I welcomed the lazy day with open arms.

I used to fantasize about what it might be like to be a mom.
Be home, all day, every day.
Make my own schedule.
Be my own boss.
Know I'm finally in a position where I can really make a difference.
Be in a place where I know what I'm doing really matters.

I knew being a mom would be hard,
but at the same time,
I totally thought it'd be easy.
Well, easier.

And I think that's the same trap so many young wives fall into.

They see parenting as an easy way out,
a glorified day job with great flexibility.
And they leave their husbands to figure out a way to juggle dad duties with full time work, full time school, and maybe the occasional panic attack.

And I'll be fair.
sometimes this works.
sometimes it's wonderful!
sometimes it's exactly what they signed on for.

But I think sometimes it's hard.
Really hard.
And for me, this weekend was an eye-opener that
NEWS FLASH!

Parenting's not just day job.
It's day and night.
No holidays.
No weekends.
No breaks for 20+ years if you plan on having more than one kid.
and really your whole life if you think about it.

There's no set schedule,
not for awhile at least,
and there's very. little. sleep.

Plus, if you mess up,
there's no re-dos.
You can't void out the receipt and run the transaction again.
Nope.
You just move on and hope and pray you didn't do any permanent damage to this little life you've created.

Yikes...

So, long story short, I think parenting's wonderful.
I have so much respect for those people who are parents.
But I don't think it's a job you rush into to try and escape the real world.
Because it is the real world.
And a whole lot less cozy than the lives we lead right now.

And now I'll step down off my soapbox.

I think the boys had fun.
I know we did.
And I do hope we can do it again someday soon.
I love Parker so much more whenever I see him with kids.
He's going to be super-dad someday,
with silly games and sweet bedtime stories.
And we'll be happier than ever.
I know that.

Because even though we were absolutely spent come 11 o'clock Friday night,
we couldn't stop smiling.
There's really nothing like listening to a little one pray
before tucking them into bed with a goodnight kiss
closing the door
and cuddling up on the couch with your best ally.
the only other person who cares about the little munchkins as much as you do.
and the only one who knows what a battle it is to try and do this parenting thing right each and every day.

I'm excited for the day when we'll have that feeling every day.
But kind of terrified too.
So I think I'll stick to sampling parenthood for awhile.
I'm not ready for a full dose just yet :)

4 comments:

  1. uh oh 2 posts in a row trying to talk yourself out of having kids :) you can just steal mine whenever i'm down

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  2. You get used to the lack of sleep. I can run on only a few hours of sleep per night for about a week before I need a full night or a nap. But you don't start out with 4 all at once, there's a reason when it happens the way God designed there are only one or two, and even then... call your mom in for support (I do ALL the time). But it's the best - my favorite bumper sticker "I never worked full-time until I was a MOM!" so true, and so worth it!

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  3. You will be a great mom someday. Thanks so much for the attention and love that you give my boys, they adore you and Parker. And remember, you usually only get 1 kid at a time. As newborns they sleep a lot and as they grow and change, so do you as a parent. I always feel so dumb when people ask me what I do all day, because most days it is just laundry, dishes, and a little cleaning, which doesn't really sound like that much, but sometimes I can't even do all of that. The thing I miss the very most about life before kids is sleep. Other than that, I wouldn't ever go back, I love my job.
    ps-thanks for making the boys sound so angelic :)

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  4. Sounds like a really fun adventure for all of you!

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